It finally happened.
Over the last year I have been ill a total of 0 times, no days off work or school, nothing.
But it finally happened but really as I sit here writing this…things could be worse.
1) It’s okay to wear pyjamas all day. Even smelly pyjamas that have tomato ketchup on them.
2) You can also forget about hair brushing, washing up or Cooking dinner.
3) You can eat a healthy dose of haribos and crisps,you know just for energy..
4) People voluntarily offer to bring you tea.
5) Duvet cocoons: do I even need to see anymore?
6) People can’t ask you too many things that involve serious brain power (so no don’t ask me about your dickhead boyfriend).
7) You can sleep all day and no one throws the word ‘lazy’ around.
8) If you really put on a show (a few sad little sniffs, a cough) maybe someone will even go to the shop and stock up on haribos for you.
9) You can watch Disney films without having to worry about people thinking you’re a woman/man-child.
10) You don’t even have to get out of bed to put your snotty tissues in the bin, because somebody has kindly moved it closer to you.
11) When your ears are blocked you can hear people asking you to do anything.
12) Also works with a blocked nose and smelly people.
13) You don’t have to worry about unexpected guests because nobody really wants to see your sweaty, snotty face right now.
14) It might be cold outside but it’s perfectly fine because your 1 billion degrees anyway.
15) People are extra nice to you and sometimes give you biscuits.
16) You can miss the gym (for the 2000th day in a row) with a proper excuse.
17) The only things you need are: remote, tea and somebody to change the dvd once in a while.