Lists

Shit people who wear contact lenses say…

image

A contact lense wearing a day is never without weird eye related problems that you make you like you’re winking with the whole supermarke or  suffer from crying all the time..

1) ‘oh one second I just have to put my eyes in’ 

2) ‘No mum I’m not crying, honestly I’m fine it’s just my contacts’

3) ‘Right nobody move…nobody move I’ve dropped one of my contacts’

4) ‘My eyes are so bloody dry I feel like there going to fall out my head in a minute’ 

5) ‘Nah sorry I can’t stay over, I’ve not got my contact case with me’ 

6) ‘I came home drunk yesterday and I think I might have got my eyes mixed up…and now I think my right contact is in my left eye…’ 

7) ‘It’s so cool, I can just put these little tiny harmless pieces of pla- my eeeeeyes are streaming…what’s happening?!’

8) ‘No mum I’m not high it’s my contact lenses….’

9) ‘Alright guys the the sick sounds are a bit far, I’m only putting my fingers in my eye!’

10) ‘Hmm looks like cases filled with salt water solution are not best left next to the window on a sunny day…’

11) ‘I have like 3…wel maybe 5 contact cases, come on there aren’t really that many’

12) ‘Oops sorry didn’t mean to wink at you just trying to readjust a contact lense’

13) ‘haah your jokes about my eyesight being suddenly cured overnight because yesterday I had glasses on are so funny. So funny’ 

14) ‘Why do they make this things so tiny…it would be so easy to break- oh great I need a new one’ 

15) ‘MY CONTACT LENSE WILL NOT COME OUT, THIS IS IT THIS IS THIS IS HOW I LOSE MY EYE!’ 

16) ‘Has anyone seen my glasses….I took my contact lenses out before I found them…’

Love Robyn x 


23 thoughts on “Shit people who wear contact lenses say…”

  1. I’ve had my glasses for a little over a year. People have asked me if I’ve ever considered doing contacts instead. I will never consider contacts. It freaks me out to think about sticking something onto my eyeball. I don’t even like eye drops. Just… no.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. #16 is me. I have to literally grope, fall over, bruise my face, insult my roommate, before the darned glasses show up. Holy Momma of Blind Bats.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I had to stop wearing contacts last year, and though I was really bummed at the time now I don’t really miss them at all, for all these reasons! My wording for #6 was always “I’ve put my contacts in the wrong eyes” which always made someone (thinking they were really funny) say “Which eyes did you mean to put them into?” Yeah, that’s hilarious.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. All of this. So. True. I have put my contacts in inside out and in the wrong eyes, and suffered through half a day before realizing what the problem was. Once I lost a contact lens in the bathroom and crawled around on my hands and keeps for 45 minutes before I found it stuck to the sink. Fun times!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I can’t see how on earth people can even consider using contact lenses in the first place! But we glasses-wearers are so glad that you do! 1) because we feel self-concious enough that we have to wear glasses in the first place & we all think you are so brave! & 2) because, with all the problems you list above, it’s so entertaining to see people ‘struggling’ to fit them, use them & crawl around looking for them amongst the many other troubles you all have. Hours of endless pleasure! Although my problems with glasses mostly include scratches as, hating having to put a case the size of a small handgun in my pocket, I usually just slip the glasses in my pocket as they are, which scratch other things like keys & I drop them all over the place, I guess you don’t have those problems in contact world?

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes. But you are all so much braver. Us glasses only guys & gals are like the people who work on the ground at NASA & you contacts too people, well you’re like the astronauts. You go all the way, in contacts!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I’ve just read what I wrote. (there’s a first time for everything)! That sounds really stupid, doesn’t it?

    Like

  7. ‘MY CONTACT LENSE WILL NOT COME OUT, THIS IS IT THIS IS THIS IS HOW I LOSE MY EYE!’
    I said exactly that the first time I’d put on my lenses! I was so sure they’d never come out 😉
    Looks like they do. :p

    Liked by 1 person

  8. When I wore contacts I probably said most of these! I even lost one in my eye, could not get it out, and the Dr. Couldn’t find it…six weeks later I was on the beach and my eyes watered because of the bright sun…out came the contact and it was was split almost in half!

    Like

  9. Back in the 90’s there seemed to be a plague of people losing a contact lense and a host of people crawling on the ground looking for it. Whatever happened to those halcyon days of yore? (I just really wanted to use “halcyon days of yore.” How often does anyone get that opportunity?)

    Like

Leave a comment