1. ‘Tomorrow I will get up 10 minutes earlier so I don’t have to rush around the house like a maniac before work. ‘ Never happens.
2. ‘Oh yeah and I’ll definitely make my lunch the night before.’ Also just a dream.
3. ‘Today I’m not going to eat any rubbish food, I have flax seeds, love flax seeds.’ Broken by 10am because somebody brought flapjacks into work.
4. ‘Today I’m going to dedicate myself to my work, definitely’ Broken as soon as you get a Facebook notification.
5. ‘I’ll stop spending my money on stupid things, I really don’t need another nail varnish.’ You did need that nail varnish.
6. ‘ I think today will be the day i start a Cleanse, tone and moisturise routine.’Ha.
7. ‘I’m such a grown up, gosh so mature’ lasts until you have to pay a bill or do something grown up, and then you’ll be crying and banging your hands on the table,
8. ‘I’ll just have one glass of wine today’ (okay this is not everyday) come on we know how this story goes.
9. ‘I won’t spend as much time on my computer today or staring at my phone’ you check it for ‘literally 1 second’ and before you know it hours had passed.
10. ‘I’ll be nice to everybody today!’ Lasts until somebody bumps into you on the train and you kick them with your mind.
11. ‘Today will be the day I clean out my wardrobe, have a good spring clean’ but there are just so many better things to do, like sitting around in my pyjamas.
12. ‘Instead of just trying to remember everything I ever do ever I’ll write it down’ You realise you forgot to do this at 10pm when you wake up remembering something you were supposed to do 5 hours ago.
13. ‘I will spell check my blog posts’ IM SORRY.
14. ‘I’m gunna send cards to my family because I’m such a good daughter/sister’ have you seen the price of stamps?
15. ‘I will stop just leaving my clothes on the floors hen I’m done with them’ last until you have to fold some clothes up and you realise how BORING it is.
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